So, a couple of days ago, I showed you the first page of the LIfe Book I'm creating for my daughter, Alex.  Well, baby, I'm on a roll:  presenting page 2, which roughly captures the first 24 hours of her life.

Alex's birthmother and Alex spent 2 days at the hospital, and Alex was born at 5:36 p.m.  So the next morning, my husband Marcus and I spent the entire day at the hospital with Alex's birthmother (I'll call her "B"), and Alex.  As I went through my photo archives and found pictures of that day, I was pleased to find that I had many  to choose from -- and we're all smiling and happy, thrilled about this new little life that had entered the world.  I picked four photographs for Alex's life book:  one of me holding Alex, one of Marcus holding her (I love the expression on his face), and two of B holding her.   In one of the pictures with B and Alex, you can only see the back of Alex's head; however, B is clearly in the throes of relaxed laughter.  In the other picture, B is cradling Alex in her arms, and smiling beautifully for the camera.


I love that this page conveys how excited we were about Alex's birth, because truly, we -- all three -- couldn't have been happier.  There are some aspects of the whole experience that it doesn't convey, however:  for example, the abject fear that I was feeling that B might change her mind.  In Texas, there is a 48-hour time period after a baby's birth during which a birthmother cannot sign away her parental rights; however, after the 48 hours, once she signs, her parental rights are terminated.  The pictures on this page were taken smack in the middle of that 48-hour period, and I was petrified that now that she'd seen her little girl, she would have second thoughts.

Additionally, though I have no photographs that capture this, I'm sure B was going through her own private hell during this time as well -- wondering if she made the right decision, and feeling guilty that she was even questioning this, because of the friendship that had developed between she and I before the birth.  Every time I think back to this time, I am awed by the selfless act of placing a child for adoption.  I have to tell ya  -- B's a strong woman.

Anyway, B  obviously went through with the placement, of course, and it's all turned out beautifully -- we're still in contact with her, and she loves seeing how happy Alex is.  For this reason, I decided not to include the nervousness either of us felt on this page -- there's no reason for Alex to know about that right away.  One day, when she's much older, I'll probably tell her.

If she asks.